Relationship Reflection

~“Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some stay for awhile and leave footprints on our hearts. And we are never, ever the same.”

Relationships are important to me because they help with my growth and provide support when I need it. Each relationship that I engaged in bring different things. Some relationships bring comfort, safety, joy, laughter, discipline, creativity, respect, honor, and most of all love. All of these characteristics are important in many of my relationships. Relationships are also important because they keep me grounded and very often motivated. Without certain relationship in my life I'm not sure where I would be currently.

This is my best friend Lekeia Sears and our friendship means the world to me. We have been friends for 14 years and counting and she has been a blessing in my life since 9th grade. There is nothing that I can't share with her. While we have had great times together there has also been rough times. In those rough times I feel it just made our friendship stronger. She is a major person I lean on for support when dealing with struggles especially school. I admire her strength and determination to provide a loving atmosphere for her daughter who is also my god daughter. I made it thru two degree's working on my third because she has always been in my corner telling me "Reach for the Stars". What make this relationship/friendship so amazing is because her love for me goes beyond the scope of a friendship. I love her to pieces and our bond is inseparable.

This is my awesome dance ministry "Overflow". I had the great pleasure of knowing these ladies for about 8 years. This dance ministry has played such a huge role in life. These ladies are silly, creative, loving, but most of all supporting. We are not just a dance ministry in church but we are a family. We share opinions and have disagreements but we respect each other thoughts. Something that I love about these ladies is that we are in tune with each. When ministering in dance we can pull from each other strength and its this that keeps us going. We each have different personalities that makes our relationship with one another awesome. This ministry has taught me discipline, self value, and how to be free. My self concept has changed because of these ladies. I can look in the mirror and say I'm beautiful and that I am a phenomenal woman. Currently, we still teach other things and I can't imagine life without them.

This is my soon to be husband Joseph who is my best friend, peace in conflict and frustration, motivator, supporter, and prayer warrior. While we are in a relationship I consider us partners for life. I call us "Team Brown". He is my high school sweet heart and he keeps me on my toes. I say we are "Team Brown" not just because on 4/12/14 that will become my last name but more so because currently we make decisions as a team.Our goals and dreams have been laid out and we made a decision to support another. Our love for one another is genuine and we value and respect each other. As in any partnership there will come bumps in the road. However, we have over came these bumps by simply have effective communication which includes "Listening". I love him more and more each day because he teaches me how to be patient and humble. Looking forward to becoming Mrs. Joseph Maurice Brown.

Each relationship has an positive impact on my life but its also because of challenges that they remain positive. When I first joined my dance ministry I didn't take it seriously. I came to rehearsals late and showed up to church when it was convenient for me. At some point my dance leader had to sit me down and tell me in so many words that I need to either be a team player or leave the ministry. That one encounter really changed my life. I still have the email she sent about being a team player and what happens to the team when everyone doesn't pull their weight. I learned how to not be selfish and think of others feelings. I didn't realize at that time how my absence from the ministry made the ministry look. Currently, anyone will say i go beyond the call of being a team player and I also encourage others to be effective team members. My dance leader still calls me her "Ride or Die" team member and that means a lot to me. It shows me how far I grown and how serious my commitment is to the team.

Working in early childhood I can use my team player experience to help children work together. Currently, I have a 1 and 2 year old and i teach them how to clean up together. They actually use clean up time as a fun time experience. They laugh, play, and eventually all the toys get pick up off the floor. It feels great to be able to help children using things that I have learned from past experiences.

 

Children Quotes and Professional Thanks

There are many children quotes that I absolutely love. I feel that each quote gives me a different insight about children. I just picked out a few quotes that I would like to share.

“Children are made readers on the laps of their parents.”
~ Emilie Buchwald

"Don't handicap your children by making their lives easy".
~Robert A. Heinlein

"Children make your life important".

~Erma Bombeck

"Children make you want to start life over". 

~Muhammad Ali

"Children need the freedom and time to play.  Play is not a luxury.  Play is a necessity". 

 ~Kay Redfield Jamison

As this semester comes to an end I truly want to say thank you to everyone for taking time to read my thoughts and feelings. I know at times some of my work is long winded but I appreciate that many of you found time to read it and give your thoughts. A special thank you to Jamie who always gave honest feedback during discussions. I always looked forward to reading your post and your comments. Michelle, this is my second course with you and you always motivate me to keep pushing and never give up. Thank you for being "REAL". It's not many people with that characteristic these days. Lastly, thank you ShaRina. You made blogging fun and creative. At times I would always look on your blog to see how you wrote out the assignment. I appreciate your words of wisdom and all your comments on my blog. I look forward to sharing many thoughts and ideas with you. 

Assessing: Good or Bad Thing

 
The school district of Philadelphia is currently closing 64 schools. 40 percent of the children from the public schools will be attending charter schools. While some parents may think that "charter" schools are better, I feel that the parents should take a closer look. Hardy-Williams Charter School is a considered a great school. Many parents put their children on a waiting list because they feel that this school will properly prepare their child for the future. Currently, my nephew attends this school. One marking period he was on the honor roll and the second marking period we were failing. Now I'm thinking how could this be? His grades are based on class work, homework, and how high his test scores are on Benchmarks. Each marking period he goes through a week of testing. When I visited the website for the school it said "All core courses are aligned to Mastery’s interim assessments commonly referred to as Benchmarks. Teachers use the Benchmarks, scope and sequences and other course resources to plan daily lessons and units of study. All core courses are designed in accordance with State standards and back-mapped from college preparatory skills". Talking to my nephew teacher she informed that 60 percent of his grade depends on how well he does on the Benchmarks. Now my questioned is does the Benchmarks really help my nephew or does the benchmarks make the school look good. I feel that this type of structured learning is not really helping the cognitive development of the child. The teachers who are in these classrooms don't really know the curriculum they are teaching. The teachers are just following guidelines and standards that the school gave them. Also, the teachers are only teaching the material that are on these standardize Benchmarks.

When assessing children I think it is important to assess their learning abilities. All children are different and they learn differently. If the teacher is only accustom to teaching one way and a child is not adapting to that way of learning the child will get the short end of the stick. At my nephew school the teachers do not change the way they teach. When my nephew didn't do well on his second marking period the school just suggested that he attend tutoring on Tuesday or Thursday. I thought the whole purpose of assessing was to diagnose specific strengths and weaknesses in an individual's learning, and to motivate further learning. They diagnosed him but still kept in the same classroom with the same way of learning. Teachers have not creativity or opportunities to step outside the box. Children are not robots you can’t just program them and keep it moving. While assessing is necessary it should always in the interest of better the life of the child.

Japan is the country that I choose to research about how they assessed children. Japanese way of assessing is highly different then the way the U.S assesses children. Newborns to five are either placed in daycare's or center-based programs. These two facilities are not required by law to enforce curriculum such as reading or math. Each child is given the liberty to be free and have a playful environment. While Japanese culture feel it is helpful it’s actually harmful to the child. When the child is placed in kindergarten they already are behind on knowing the basics. In elementary school Japanese way of assessing is different. They challenge the minds of children in every area of their life. For example, a Japanese teacher teaches children the proper way to behave. Teachers are more concerned with, how virtually all children have the ability to learn well and to master the regular school curriculum and certain habits and characteristics, such as diligence and attention to detail, can be taught. Following the curriculum to prepare students for standardize test is the least of the Japanese teachers concern. Each grade level is categorized and provides information on how the children are assessed. In doing the research I found that the children learn accustom to their culture. For more information visit….Japanese Way of Assessing Children

Stressor (POVERTY)

In my previous class I talked about growing up in poverty. First and foremost let me say that I love my parents and I wouldn't be who I am today if it wasn't for their unconditional love. Growing up wasn't easy. I have 10 siblings and we all lived in the three bedroom apartment in a low housing complex. We called it the projects. I was raised on WIC cereal which consisted of King Vitamin, Life, and Kix. Growing up I felt like I was extra poor. I didn't get the latest fashion of clothing, no name brand sneakers, and boy the hair styles I had was unbelievable. I choose to talk about poverty because i have experience this as child. I had many days when I was angry, upset, embarrassed, and confused. Both my parents worked everyday. My father was in the Navy and my mother worked for the school board of Philadelphia. How could both my parents be working and yet I still had to wear clothing handed down from my older sister, peanut butter and jelly sandwich's was a meal not a snack, and living in the projects was the "norm".

Going to school was hard because I teased on a lot for how I dressed, how dark I was, and how I always at the school lunch. Was that a stressful time in my childhood yes but I overcame it. As I got older I started to understand that my parents were doing the best that they could. I may not had the best meals but I ate My parents allowed my siblings and I to attend after school programs and while there they provided snacks. Although, I had to wear clothing handed down from my sister I still made sure I took good care of the clothing so that the person after me would have it in good condition Living in poverty taught me a lot. As I was going through school I always had big dreams and was determined that I was going to be somebody important one day. Living in poverty boosted my confidence level up. Where I lived and how I lived wasn't going to be the factor of who I would become one day! The major reason why I switched my whole career choice is so that I can give back to my community. I'm the only person in my family to attend college. Currently, I hold two degrees and determined to get two more. Poverty still exist but I speak better for myself as well as my family everyday. Can I change the poverty rate in my community probably not but can help motivate others to push and not give up YES! Below is a link of my city poverty rate.
Philadelphia Pennsylvania Poverty Rate
This not my country that I choose to talk about but I wanted to give readers an insight of my community. Currently, between the ages of newborns to age 5 36 percent are living below half the poverty level. I truly feel that this is sad and for America to be a wealthy country they have so many children living in poverty. According to Howard Friedman U.S is ranked number 4 with the highest poverty level. Number 4! WOW! Here is the link Top 5 Countries with Highest Poverty Rating

 

Africa is the country that I decided to learn about because my dance ministry will soon be visiting and I wanted to see how the country is coping with poverty. Poverty in Africa is also considered to be hunger and starvation. Some diseases that highly widespread are AIDS, malaria, and cholera. Africa is believed to be in these poor conditions due to lack of land management. The water is bad there and due to corrupted government is it hard for countries to sell or import goods. Africa does not have ways for getting medicine to those with diseases and because of this the diseases spread more. Some countries in Africa are not doing as bad as others because the seek help from corrupted wealthy western countries. Africa has been trying to do better. in 2008 they created a African Union called African Peer Review Mechanism. This is a self voluntary forum that monitors politics, government officials and the values of the country. Out of fifty three states, twenty nine signed up for the Union. Besides the union nothing else is being done about diseases, education, poverty, or hunger. China has tried to stepped in to help but its only so much they can do. If Africa wants to improve there rates have to come together and help each other. Fixing the water supply can help with crops in the land and government officials can create lesser strict laws to make sure the import and exports of good benefits the country. You can look at more details of Africa at Poverty In Africa

Breastfeeding

Breastfeeding is a special bond between a mother and child. Nation wide breastfeeding is common. Currently, I am not a mother but I have always imagined that I would breastfeed my children. Growing up I always wondered why my mother never breast fed any of my siblings. When I asked my mother why her reply was "After marriage I had all of you back to back. It would have been hard and draining to breastfeed because right after birth I had to go right back to work to help with providing for the family". A part of me understood her reasoning because it was a struggle growing up and my parents worked a lot to make sure our basic needs were taken care of. A major reason why I chose breastfeeding because it is not common at all in my family. I have 8 sisters and not one of them breast fed any of there children. I want to be the difference in my family. I want to have that connection with my children. Also, I want to be able to ensure that my child have the best nutrition.

There are many benefits to breastfeeding. Listed below are a few ways of how it is beneficial to the baby, mother, and the family

For the baby

• Protection against childhood diseases, since breast milk contains antibodies
• Breast Milk has micronutrients not found in formula
• Less Infant illness, including allergies, ear infections, stomach upsets
• Balance of nutrition (fat, protein, etc.) adjusts to age of baby

For the Mother

• Easier bonding with the child
• Reduced risk of breast cancer and oesteoporosis
• No formula to prepare; no sterilization
• Satisfaction of meeting infant basic needs

For the Family

• Less stress on the father, especially at night
• Increased family income (because formula and medical care are expensive)
• Increased survival of other children (because of spacing of births)

For more information on of Benefits of Breast-Feeding you can visit http://www.healthcare.gov/news/factsheets/2010/12/breastfeeding.html

Although breastfeeding is universal the rates in other countries vary. Australia is the country I chose to research. Breastfeeding is Australia is highly encouraged.  This country even has made laws to protect women who breastfeed. Approximately 92 per cent of Australian babies are breastfed at birth However, there was a sharp decline in both full and any breastfeeding with each month post birth. A primary reason why the rate in breastfeeding dropped is because women return to work. Some other leading causes are inadequate milk supply, problems with breastfeeding, and some feel it is just a need to stop. Australia developed a breastfeeding strategy to help promote, protect, support, and monitor breastfeeding. The full strategy can be viewed at Australian National Breastfeeding Strategy.

In addition, I took the liberty of finding information about how people viewed woman who breast fed in public. In each country there are different views. In Australia the government created laws to protect mother's who wish to breastfeed in public. These laws protect them from any discrimination in the workplace, in public restaurants, as well as any where in the community. There are hotlines available for woman who experience negative comments about breastfeeding publicly. For the Full list of laws you can visit Breast-Feeding in public, your legal right.

I believe that the information I gathered can be useful to all mother's. As a home childcare provider I hope to promote breastfeeding. Woman should have the opportunity to experience breastfeeding regardless of if they have to work or not. I believe that by communicating the benefits and the importance of breastfeeding it will encourage mothers (starting with my sisters) to start breastfeeding. Also, I feel that once I have a child of my own and breastfeed this will be proof to my family that breastfeeding can be done while working. Some people say "I believe it when I see it" so I want to be the proof that people need.

Reference
Berger, K. S. (2012). The developing person through childhood (6th ed.). New York, NY: Worth Publishers.

Precious Memory of Childbirth

February 26, 2002 will be a day that will be a precious memory for me. I had the opportunity to help coach my older sister while giving birth to my nephew. Now we went to parenting classes to help prep us for the big but the experience in the classroom was way different from the hospital room. It seem like once the baby was actually coming everything was fast. I was blessed to be able to stand beside my sister because I was the only sibling with enough courage to handle the pressure. Once we got to the hospital I watch as they prep my sister and placed her in a room. Things was pretty good until that pain started kicking in faster and faster. Before I could call the doctor he was already in the room giving my sister epidural. Now let me say I have no children of my own so I don't know what contractions feel like at all. However, when that doctor came in the room with that huge needle I remember bending over asking my sister "Girl you sure you want this".  She gave me this look that gave me confirmation that she wanted this. The labor seem like forever but when it was time to push it seemed everyone was excited but my sister. The pushing was not so good for sister. After like four or five pushes I remember my nephew getting stuck. Next thing I see are these silver clamps and I'm thinking to myself "what in the world is the doctor about to do with those"? At this point I"m panicking but I had to keep it together and be strong for my sister. With the help of the clamps and some more pushing my nephew finally arrived and he was a screaming baby. He was a healthy child and it was day I will never forget.

Currently, I have no children of my own. My fiance would like at least one and I'm working on enough courage to someday give him a child. The birthing experience was scary to me but precious at the same time. I do have a fear of having children just because I know that with each one of my siblings there was always complications and i just fear that I too may have some. I chose this experience because it taught me how to be a team mate and have patience. My nephew father wasn't around when my sister was pregnant and I had the opportunity to be a good support to my sister even at a young age. From my experience with my sister I think that the classes we took together, going to her prenatal appointments, and the activities we did help with the healthy outcome of my nephew. He is extremely smart and he learned how to read a very young age.

Japan has different views and beliefs when it comes to child birth. What I have learned from the research is that Japanese mothers are not allowed to have anyone in the room but the doctor, nurse, and significant other. Here in the US I along with both of my parents were permitted to be in the room. When giving birth vaginal deliveries are preferred without pain medication or an episiotomy (surgical incision made to prevent tearing of the vagina). As soon as that pain start kicking in my sister requested pain medication. I don't think she would have agreed to a natural birth. Listed below are some more key things about the Japanese culture.

After the child is born the following things happen in the Japanese culture:

• The mother is not to wash her hair for 1 week because it is not good to flex her neck.
  
• In Japan, the new mom usually goes to her parents home for about 20-30 days.  The grandmother will perform all household duties, because the new mom is not allowed to touch water for washing dishes or doing laundry.  She is also not allowed to drive anywhere.  After that time period, the postpartum mom returns home to her husband with their baby.
• Between 30 and 32 days, the family will then return to the shrine to pray, pay respect, and to offer thanks for a safe delivery and healthy child. The ceremony is called "omiya maeiri".
  
• In Japan, the babies are frequently named after their grandparents.
• An ideal family would be made up of a married couple with 2 children. If a couple were to have 3 or more children, they are thought to be wealthy.

To find out more visit  http://www.hawcc.hawaii.edu/nursing/RNJapanese_04.html

A Note of Thanks and Support

To all my colleagues,
I couldn't have ask for a better group of colleagues than you. I have leaned so much from each of you and I truly hope that it doesn't end here. I would love for everyone to keep checking out my blog and keep your blog going also. I feel that thru the blog we can continue to learn from one another and stay connected. Your encouragement throughout this course has motivated me to not just get my Master's Degree but also my Doctorate Degree! I'm still fired up to change children lives and I know you are too. Thank you all for your thoughts and kind words and I look forward to talking to you all soon........